Friday, March 8, 2013

270 Days and Weighing

This morning my weight was as it was yesterday morning, 185.2... which is saying something cause I had pizza for dinner last night!

I had my husband snap this picture of me this morning quickly.. Sorry about the mess behind me, you can tell I have a 4 year old daughter.

I'm very proud that I'm doing this well and I'd like to continue on my path. I still suffer from the destructive thinking that I had before..

"I've been here before and gained it all back"
"All it'll take is a few bad days and it'll all pack on again"
"I may have the confidence now, but I'm sure I'll fall off again."

These thoughts are poison... and I need to rid myself of them.

I keep telling myself, "When you see 189 you'll feel better." ....

"When you break 10 lbs, you'll feel better"....

Now it's "when you see 179, you'll feel better."

But the thing is, I already DO feel better.. cause I'm in the zone.. and I'm DOING it. That's the best I can say. At least I'm doing it.

I haven't exercised. I'm guilty of that lazy habit. I am also guilty of making sad excuses. "If I exercise the muscle and water retention will prevent me from losing.'... Stupid right?

That'll be my next big challenge, but right now I'm aiming to break 180. It's been such a long time since I've done that, that I'm hoping it'll give me some nice motivation. The lowest weight I've been since the birth of my daughter was 168. This was July of 2011. Since that fateful summer, I've been on an up-hill spiral that I finally feel I may have the motivation, confidence and momentum to surpass and NOT quit.

I have 3 more weeks until I have a vacation in SC and TN.. And I'd really like to be in the 170's by that time, so I can try to keep my motivation going to not "lose myself" in "Vacation mode" as I usually do.

But this is not a diet, it's going to have to be my new way of life.. and I'm in it for the long haul.

Thanks for listening!



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